Twas the Night Before Christmas: Blogger Edition.

I’m sure none of you need reminding that it’s Christmas Eve. I am like a child at Christmas and it genuinely is the most wonderful time of the year for me. It’s glittery and cheesy, and just how I like it. This is the first year I have a proper job, and I’m working today. In fact, I will be rushing around the house getting ready right about now. I’m sure though I’m not the only one who’s busy today and sometimes Christmas can get a bit full on. So, with all that being said, I thought I’d do a bit of a fun post for you today. I’ve taken the very well know poem by Clement Clarke Moore and put a bit of a Blogger spin on it. I’ve marked the words I’ve added in red. Merry Christmas everyone!

Twas the night before Christmas, when all though the house
Not a laptop was stirring, not even a (computer) mouse.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St Nicholas soon would be there.

The bloggers were nestled all snug in their bed.
While visions of nail varnish danced in their heads.

And mama in her rollers, and I in my cap,
had just settled out brains for a long winter’s nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the day bed to see what was the matter,
Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of instagram filters to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight pouting reindeer.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a tweet it must be St Nick.

More rapid than a snapchat his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

Now Kendall! now, Karlie! now, Cara and Vixen!

On, Comet! On, Cupid! on, on Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.

So up to the catwalk the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of make-up, and St Nicholas too.

And then, with some background music, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I dew in my head, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in Topman, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.

A bundle of make-up he had flung on his back.

And he looked like a peddler, just opening his pack.

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was lined like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.

The stump of a cig he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook when he laugh, like a bowlful of shower jelly!

He was curvy and plump, a right sassy old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself!

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Son gave me to know that I had noting to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk.

And holding his phone infront of his nose,

And taking a selfie, up the chimney he rose!

He sprang to his sleigh, to his followers gave a whistle.

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard he uploaded later than planned,

“Happy Christmas to all and may your blogs all expand!”




xoxo
J

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  • I LOVE Christmas eve and am also a secret child! I celebrated with a Christmas eve box from my boy with all goodies in and the obligatory nee pajamas and then ate my weight in food and alcohol! In which I have done so since haha!
    I love the spin you have put on the poem!
    Merry Christmas! xox